While everybody else is busy constructing their list of the Best and Worst Movies of 2011, I’m right here organizing my year-end list for, believe it or not, 2009. I’m aware that us Filipinos are notoriously known for being late, but this is just ridiculous. Here is a blog post that will probably inspire very little interest, precisely because it is two years too late. But what the heck – I’ll post it anyway. One would naturally think that I would have no valid excuse for such a delay, but I can actually explain.
Dedicated movie lovers who live in the same country as yours truly will not have a hard time agreeing that it can be real frustrating to be a cinephile in the Philippines. The overwhelming awfulness of the majority of our county’s movies cannot be denied, but it is not what ultimately drags me into hopeless depression. My quarrels and objections against the artistic illiteracy of this country are long and many, yet I shall not go into specifics, for this is not what I am here for. Simply put, the Philippines is a place that does not welcome Better Movies, which makes it difficult for me to catch up with the movies I need to see.
Of the 10 movies featured in my Best Movies list, less than half of them were featured in a local theater; the rest I had to wait months for the DVD release. I shall attempt to explain further in my post, “The Best and Worst Movies of 2010”, that is to be published next month. But in the meantime, here are my choices for 2009.
Friday, December 30, 2011
The Best and Worst Movies of 2009
Friday, December 23, 2011
Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol Movie Review
Rating:
I cut to the chase when I say that “Mission: Impossible – Ghost Protocol” is the best action movie of 2011. Not much of a statement, you might think, since trash like “Battle: Los Angeles” and “Transformers: Dark of the Moon” were released in the same year. But whatever. I felt a shy satisfaction while viewing it. I thought that my growing cynicism, thanks to the two movies above, had deemed it impossible for me to cherish another explosion, but all is not lost. There is sophistication in its silliness and spectacle in its set pieces. I urge every fun-seeking movie-lover to see it in front of the big screen. (I heard the IMAX version is wonderful.)
The latest “Mission: Impossible” flick is a triathlon of stunts, escapes, chases, and shootouts. A lot of them are performed, dangerously, by Tom Cruise himself. At age 49, you would think that the guy would welcome the expertise of a stunt double, but not today. That’s really Cruise hauling his own ass. And there’s a lot more ass-hauling here than your average action movie, but the bombardment is backed up with ambition and artistry. What places the movie in a high order within its class is its mindset to surpass expectations. It always manages to add an extra layer of oomph and finesse in each section of its screenplay.
Monday, December 19, 2011
The Lion King Movie Review
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With the immediate exception of the prodigious “Toy Story”, my repeated viewings of “The Lion King” were one of the great highlights of my childhood. I preserved my VHS copy with fervent dedication, which I viewed at least a dozen times during the course of my grade school days. I was an introvert youngster with an immense collection of Disney movies. Claiming the title of “Couch Potato” at age five, I cannot deny that I was a spoiled little brat. And yet now I declare that I was not spoiled enough, knowing that I was never taken to see “The Lion King” during its initial theatrical run. Where were my parents when I needed them?
But no worries. Because just this week, at twenty years of age, I have redeemed myself, which makes this re-lease of “The Lion King” a necessary one. That the movie debuted at #1 in the United States last September is no surprise to me at all. And if the movie had to be converted to unnecessary 3-D to make the re-release possible, then so be it. Such an opportunity doesn’t come very often, and only those with closed minds and ungrateful spirits will respond to it with whining and complains.
Wednesday, December 14, 2011
50/50 Movie Review
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“50/50” is an optimistic movie that breathes out hope, a movie whose frail heart is comforted by its funny bone. It achieves the emotional balance that an inferior movie like “The Bucket List” failed to find. It tells the story of 27-year-old Adam Learner (Joseph Gordon-Levitt), a calm and quiet man who is battling a kind of cancer that’s unknown to many. He is stunned by his diagnosis, but much of the devastation comes from the fact that the deadly disease has struck him this early in his life.
I was moved by the film’s sense of hope and impressed by its treatment of the topic. “50/50” can be considered both as a Tragedy and Comedy, but it treats cancer as the killer that it is, and not as a stimulant of tears or as a punchline for jokes. Joseph Gordon-Levitt leads the cast with a warm and restrained performance as Adam, but the one that surprised me here was Seth Rogen.
Sunday, December 11, 2011
Oldboy Movie Review
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Under the pouring rain, a troubled man is abruptly kidnapped after his drunken outburst at a police station. He wakes up in a secured room that resembles the look of a cheap apartment, where he would spend every single second of his next fifteen years in life. His abduction is a mystery to him; he does not know who took him, nor does he have any idea why he’s there. The opening minutes is riddled with puzzling obscurity both for the man and the audience. We know that the captive’s name is Oh Dae-Su, but nothing more.
Oh Dae-Su’s condition presents a different, crueler form of imprisonment. Unlike jailed inmates, the reason behind the punishment he endures is not explained unto him. He fears that he will be caged in that room ‘til he dies. He is denied communication from any other person. In our country, it is common for fifty men to be squeezed into prison cells that were made for twenty. In the long run, this might prove to be a better option for Dae-Su, for it is not good for man to spend a seemingly interminable amount of time in complete isolation. As the years stack, the television across Dae-Su’s bed turn into something more than just a source of entertainment- It becomes his only window to the outside world.
Thursday, December 8, 2011
The Human Centipede II Movie Review
Rating: Zero Stars
Tom Six must have had his head stuck up his ass when he came up with the idea for “The Human Centipede”. Here is an individual who considers his films as, and I quote, “works of art”. If he is correct, and we have indeed reached the point where a movie called “The Human Centipede” can be classified as art, then we might as well bestow the next available Pulitzer Prize to Stephanie Meyer.
The first “Centipede” movie dropped an oversized dump on human civilization. To confess that I was bothered by it would be inaccurate. I was violated. Excluding people with facial tattoos, criminal records, and schizophrenia, I suspect that not many folks threw coins at a well in wish of a sequel. And yet here it is. “Full Sequence”, which is infinitely more vile and despicable than its predecessor, has only one purpose behind its miserable existence, and that is to update us that the head of Tom Six is still lodged up somewhere within his anal crevices. Home Sweet Home.
Saturday, December 3, 2011
The Adventures of Tintin (3D) Movie Review
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Very few movies in recent years have launched a journey more vast and monumental than the one in “The Adventures of Tintin”. It makes its way through Europe, Morocco, and long stretches of sea and sand. It investigates a lost treasure, revisits a forgotten memory, and revives an ancient rivalry. It features several shootouts, a couple of swordfights, and a fierce battle where two towering cranes are used as battering rams. There are car chases, dueling ships, aerial assaults and fist fights. The story involves the participation of a journalist, a sailor, a dog, a hawk, a pair of twin police officers, a pack of pirates, and a pesky pickpocket.
Everything mentioned above was compressed within the movie’s 107-minute running time, yet none a single scene feels incoherent. The events that occur and the characters that emerge all seem to be devoted to the progression of the film’s plot. The leaders of its production, Steven Spielberg and Peter Jackson, are recognized for their competence when it comes to handling projects that are set in the largest of scales. And in “Tintin”, they demonstrate a form of disciplined filmmaking that’s light-years ahead of the man-child minds of Brett Ratner and Michael Bay.
Tuesday, November 29, 2011
Happy Feet Two Movie Review
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Beneath all the environmental and existential issues that layered the original “Happy Feet” was a subject of equal relevance: the unifying enchantment brought about by music. We were taken to the icy isles of Antarctica, where a kingdom of emperor penguins greeted us with mesmerizing vocal performances worthy of a Santana collaboration. It was established that penguins were naturally gifted singers, so it came as a surprise when one odd little fellow named Mumble couldn’t hit a single note.
No matter. Mumble, it turns out, projects a skill in tap dancing no penguin has ever possessed before. Like Eminem, he was the first of his kind. (Or was it Vanilla Ice?) We felt pleasure seeing and hearing Mumble’s feet produce those catchy beats even though we were pretty sure that it’s implausible to compose those sounds by stomping on ice. His example made it clear, to both us and to his fellow penguins, that music is secluded to no one; it’s a personal celebration that’s best experienced in the company of others. The penguins sang. Mumble danced. We smiled. A Win-Win-Win.
Thursday, November 24, 2011
Tower Heist
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“Tower Heist” is a robbery movie like many others. Here is a sub-genre so mindlessly recycled that films within its category are mainly differentiated by the intellectual capacity of its characters. Develop your heroes as smart individuals, and you’ve got a thriller. Gather a group of idiots, and you’re set for a comedy.
The crooks in “Tower Heist” are so hopeless that, to them, the phrase “Like Stealing Candy from a Baby” would be more of a challenge than an idiom. So incompetent are these chumps that they’d fail at conquering a 7-Eleven with a tank. Yet here they are, plotting to rob millions of dollars from a luxury hotel equipped with, and I quote, “the most advanced security systems.” We begin to doubt this claim when we notice nothing beyond the typical surveillance cameras that’s being kept in check by The Preoccupied Security Guard. His watchful eyes beam at the pages of Playboy, instead of the monitors.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo (2009) Movie Review
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“The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo” is an exceptional thriller that supplies just about everything you can expect from its genre: an unsolved crime, a devious villain, a collection of clues, a determined investigator, and a climactic sequence where they all come together. These elements are all aptly done, but our attention is captured by an enigmatic woman whose own vague life can be considered a puzzle that’s more perplexing than the one she occupies.
Her name is Lisbeth Salander (Noomi Rapace). She is a skilled surveillance agent and an ingenious computer hacker. Her face, firm and pierced, rarely reveals any form of emotion. Her dark, gothic look attracts our immediate interest, but even the most analytical of audience members cannot observe beyond her physical appearance. The dragon tattooed on her back, which we get to see once, is open to our interpretations, but that’s about as far our theories can go. She prefers to keep her secrets to herself. Conversations with Lisbeth occur only when necessary, and they usually end quickly. Moments where she secures her isolation are often “celebrated” with a lighting of a cigarette.
